Does breastfeeding have to be all or nothing?

by Stefanie
(Fort Benning)

My 3rd baby was born on october 1st and is my first boy. I started to breastfeed him right away. After 2 weeks I went to see a lactation specialist in the clinic. My son did not gain at all (did not lose any weight either). THey showed me how to latch him on right. On the left side it did not work well. I had the same problem with my older girls. Both breastfed only 1 month and 6 weeks. They advised me to wake him every 2 hours to feed him, but he always fell asleep and with 2 schoolkids there is not really the time. I also tried pumping with a manual pump. They also prescribed me Reglan. I only took it for about 4 days, because I just couldn't really function thats how tired I was. I also bought me a single electric breastpump, which right now I rarely use. I started to feed him formula like 3 weeks ago because I could tell he wasn't satisfied. He did start to gain weight but even the doctor recommenden supplementing. I still BF him with the little milk I got. Afterwards he gets a bottle. My friends and Family weren't really supporting with the breastfeeding. A friend was relieved and happy I finally started bottlefeeding. :( I totally messed it up. I wasn't able to Breastfeed again. It just makes me sad. Since the formula he spits up alot. I am not forcing him to drink the whole bottle (i make about 4 oz) but he still spits up alot. ALmost that amount he drank.
I don't want to give up Breastfeeding. I just love it. At night I exclusivly BF him, but he starting to fuss and I start to have those thoughts: I don't want to breastfeed him (which is odd, I really enjoy breastfeeding and want to continue). I don't produce a lot of milk and him drinking the bottle......he drinks maybe 1 oz and falls asleep (he was doing this during nursing too). In my arms he woulds sleep forever but soon as I put him down he wakes up. Before I supplemented he had me pinned to the couch pretty much all day, but i never produced more milk. I know now he is gaining weight but ... he is fussing pretty much all day. When I lay him down, or put him in the bouncer or even swing he starts crying. He is laying on my lap right now. That's how I can write right now. Man, I am writing a whole story here. I don't really know what my question is. I just want to breastfeed so bad, get rid of those bottles and formula. But It just seem I don't have the time. The house gotta get cleaned. Pick up the kids from school, cook and so on.I maybe produce 2 -3 oz of milk both breasts (left side is very low on milk). Does he even still benefits of the breastfeeding or am I making myself crazy over it? Should I just stop at all? I just don't know what to do right now. I wish I would have enough milk.
Answer from the lactation consultant:
Breastfeeding can be overwhelming. But it does not have to be 100% or 0%. If you come up with a consistent pattern your body will adjust. Sounds like you have not found a rhythm yet.
I would suggest you try nursing every 6 hours (or every OTHER feed): so 4 times per day. Your schedule would look something like this: 6am nurse baby, 9am bottle, 12 noon nurse , 3pm bottle, 6pm nurse, 9 pm bottle, one night feed nurse and if the baby wakes again. If you establish a routine with your body, it will make what you use. Or you could choose to nurse twice per day 12 hours apart. Any amount of breastfeeding benefits baby. Also as far as formula is concerned. Breastfed babies tend to do better when supplemented with soy or lactose free formula.
Hope this helps,
Liz Pevytoe, RN, IBCLC